A couple months ago, I went on a 24 hour trip to Boulder, Colorado. I had been invited to an impromptu party with sorority sisters whom I hadn’t seen in more than 20 years. At first, I said I couldn’t make it as I had plans in San Francisco that night. Then I realized I HAD TO GO! I needed to connect with old friends and reclaim that time in my life. Seeing and connecting with women I had once lived with, and hadn’t seen since I was 21. CRAZY…but a good crazy! A total blast from the past.
One of my favorite conversations was with a sorority sister who is very real and honest. We immediately reconnected; it was as if we were transported back to our college days. The first thing she told me was she had been married three times. With her dry sense of humor, she said: “First one – mistake. Second one – sociopath. Third one – eh, he’s a good guy.” She is now happily married to #3. We talked about her marriage to the sociopath and the difficulty she endured. She shared with me what she learned from being with him and how she had grown from the experience. The best part of the story was when she told me how she gained the courage to finally leave him. I said to her: “sometimes it takes several tries to get it right”.
Here’s what I have to say. Don’t ever be scared to make mistakes because we all make them. Sometime they are really big and other times they are relatively minor. Making mistakes helps you grow up and learn what you really want vs. what you thought you wanted. Some of my most profound learnings have come from failed attempts to get what I wanted. If you make a mistake in your career or in a relationship, don’t let it stop you from moving forward towards what you want. Just try again. Own what you want and go after it. Never give up, keep going until you get it right.
I will also add: at some point, you will feel better if you stop making the same mistakes over and over. Better to make new mistakes! Learn from the experience and don’t let go of your dream if you don’t get the result you wanted the first time. Life is one big learning process and it gets messy! Live your life full force and out loud, even when you encounter speed bumps along the way.
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