I was in Carmel Valley last weekend with a group of women. I love getting away, even if it’s only a short distance. I always get inspired and gain a new perspective by being in a different scene.
One of the many conversations we had was about how it’s difficult to ask for help. At first, I was puzzled. Men are the ones who can’t ask for help, right? It’s hard for women too. Perhaps it’s because many of us identify with the caregiver role and aren’t comfortable with others taking care of us. Or we don’t want to appear needy or better yet, feel vulnerable.
Our minds can convince us that we don’t need help. Our internal dialog can sound something like this:
I can do this on my own.
It’s no big deal, I’ll be fine.
I would hate to inconvenience anyone.
What if I ask for help and I’m rejected?
Sound familiar? Without realizing it, what you’re saying to yourself is:
I’m not important. I’m not a priority. I don’t value my own needs.
Asking for help is a sign of strength. It’s a sign of courage. It’s a sign of loving yourself. It’s a sign of knowing what you need. It’s a sign that you know you are worthy.
Every single person on the planet needs help at times. Your family, friends and loved ones are there for you. Give them a heads up in advance that you need their help. Pick the people in your life that you can count on – your front row – and let them be there for you.
Ask for what you want. Ask for what you need. Make the first move because you can’t expect others to read your mind. Reach out and ask for help.
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