Disappointment is real. It happens to all of us. Anytime you put time and energy into something you’re invested in and the outcome isn’t what you wanted, disappointment can rear its ugly head.
It can be life changing. You lose your job. Your 20 year marriage splits. You lose your life’s savings. You’re betrayed by someone you love. And there are the smaller, everyday disappointments. A friend lets you down. A work project goes awry. Plans are canceled. The new restaurant that everyone says is amazing, isn’t.
Here’s the thing: big or small, if you let a disappointment fester, it can paralyze you. I’ve seen this with some coaching clients. If it’s a biggie, at first, spending time under the covers may be a good idea and exactly what you need. But it doesn’t have to take years to get over. At some point, you need to bounce back. You gotta get up, dust yourself off and start creating what’s next.
Here are a few tips I’ve learned to move through disappointment:
1. Acknowledge it and feel your feelings! Don’t try to push your feelings away or rationalize them. Let them out, let it rip. Once you do, you’ll gain perspective.
2. Don’t dwell on the past. The sooner you accept what happened, the sooner you can open yourself up to new possibilities.
3. Learn from what happened and most importantly, be gentle and compassionate with yourself.
4. Let go of unrealistic expectations, they only get in the way of your happiness. Try to not get attached to a certain outcome – that’s what will trip you up.
It’s not about what happens, it’s about how you handle it.
You have a choice, it’s up to you.
