by Amy Matthews | Sep 27, 2019 | Business, Mindset |
We want to think we’re living on our terms but more often than not, we aren’t.
It’s easy not to succumb to societal pressures, work situations and all kinds of relationships require things of us. We care about meeting the expectations of others, we want to make others happy so we conform, accommodate and compromise. It’s just what we do.
I see this with clients and friends, all of whom are high performers and super successful.
Here are a few examples:
Your spouse/partner/friend wants you to do things for them so you do. Because you want to please them and don’t want to rock the boat
You’re being offered the coveted job you really want and instead of speaking up about a bigger salary, you take the offer you are given
You meet the demands of your high maintenance client – all the time – for fear they will take their business elsewhere
Your child wants what he/she wants and because your love for them is immense, you give it to them – because you see no other way
Your colleague or executive is uber anal and demanding and because he/she can have emotional outbursts, you do what they want – always
The truth is, life is one big negotiation. Like all negotiations, you first need to be clear on what your terms are.
Second, you need to show up at the bargaining table.
Next time before you cave into the demands of another, ask yourself these questions:
What is the best outcome – for both of us?
What am I willing to give to get?
What isn’t acceptable to me?
How important is this person or situation to me?
Living life on your terms is not for the faint of heart – it takes awareness, clarity, courage, conviction and a whole lotta self respect. Know your terms and where you stand in any situation and most importantly, know when to walk away. Your self worth depends on it.
by Amy Matthews | Aug 20, 2019 | Business, Mindset |
Confidence is the #1 issue facing women and girls today. What I mean, is a lack thereof.
We over perform, we overdo, we excel at all we do. We’re ambitious, we’re on it. We run circles around everyone. We expect so much from ourselves. And of course we have to look good while doing it all, too.
When I left the corporate world, I planned to take a year off. I was ecstatic. I was finally going to be free of the high pressure job, the endless red eye flights, the constant anxiety and worry. My adrenals were spent, I was spent. I blamed my stress and exhaustion on the job itself.
Two months into my one year sabbatical, instead of feeling a sense of ease, I was still driving myself. My todo list kept getting bigger and I had the same sense of urgency as when I was working. I was obsessed to get everything done, just so. Instead of feeling a sense of joy and freedom, I felt trapped.
I realized it wasn’t the job. It was me.
Our self worth and self esteem are wrapped up in our performance. We desperately want to be validated for who we are so we do more. As if our herculean efforts will somehow cover up and fill the void we feel deep down that we are not enough.
So many women I know are doing their lives this way. Are you?
I’m here to tell you it’s a vicious cycle. There is a better way.
True self confidence comes from a feeling from the inside. It’s feeling comfortable in your skin. It’s validating, yourself, for all that you are. It’s an unwavering belief that you are loved for who you are, not for what you do. Because you are more than enough.
The truth is, until we get a handle on this, we’ll never step fully into our power. Confidence and power go hand in hand.
Give yourself permission to ditch the overdoing and create a life of pure abundant magic. To learn more about my Freedom Method, book a clarity call with me here.
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Are you a successful, driven woman who excels at what you do… and yet you never seem to be enough?
Even though you’ve “made it,” you’re afraid to ask for what you really want.
Download The Secret Guide for Women Who Want To Create A Super Powerful, Super Free Life
The High Performer’s Playbook
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by Amy Matthews | Aug 6, 2019 | Business, In-Power |
I’m super excited to announce my new program, Woman UnRuled, Limitless!
Limitless is for ambitious, high performing women who want to live a life they truly desire, without sacrificing their careers. It’s a 4 month deep dive into what I’ve learned and know – as a technology executive, a builder of two entrepreneurial businesses and a self master of truth and knowledge. It combines leadership skills, self discovery, embracing all of who you are and a ton of practical wisdom, with one goal in mind:
To move out of your self imposed limitations, open to limitless possibility AND design the life of your dreams, with me as your guide, every step of the way.
Once you say goodbye to the stories and beliefs that don’t serve you, ditch the busy and get crystal clear on who you are and what you really want, guess what happens?
Your world truly opens up for You.
There’s never been a better time in history to be a woman. The doors are open yet we still struggle to own our power, to feel confident, to create boundaries, to step into the limelight, to feel joy and ease, to be as big and loud as we really are. It’s up to us to remove what’s in the way that limits us. It’s up to us to step through the doors to realize our full potential.
If you’re ready to #Breakfree and create a super powerful and free life full of abundance and magic, download Limitless here. Once you do, I’d love to hear from you. I want to hear what your biggest challenges are. I want to hear what your deepest desires are. I want to hear what you really want to create in your life.
“You’ve always had the power my dear, you just had to learn it for yourself”.
~ Glinda, Wizard of Oz
You are Limitless.
by Amy Matthews | Jul 30, 2019 | Business, In-Power |
Speaking our truth is essential to living a life of authenticity and passion. For many of us it’s not easy, we’d rather run for cover than to speak what’s really on our mind.
I think it’s hard because we care. We care deeply about the feelings of others, often more than we care about our own. We also fear we’ll get backlash and worry about the consequences. Here are some common fears of speaking our truth:
What if he goes ballistic?
What if she turns on me?
What if it jeopardizes my job?
What if it ends our relationship?
Can you relate to any of the above? I’ve helped many people throughout my life – clients, employees, teams, family and friends – get clear on what they want to say and say it, both verbally and in written communication. I learned this at the ripe age of 16, living with my parents who loved each other but had an acrimonious relationship. Hence, the beginning of my mediation skills.
The truth is, it’s not your job to manage the feelings of others. Your job is to:
Have the courage and speak from your heart
Keep it short and simple, two sentences to start the conversation
Communicate with clarity, confidence and compassion
Be real and present, don’t focus on the outcome
Don’t expect it to go perfectly. Like trying anything new, it takes practice!
Communicating authentically gives you greater power and freedom in your life. Who doesn’t want that? Try it. With experience, you will get the results you want, I promise.
If you have trepidation about communicating in a work situation or in your personal life, I can help.
Sign up for your free 30 Minute Clarity Call with me here.
by Amy Matthews | Apr 2, 2019 | Business |
Several of my clients, 3 to be exact, all super competent, rising stars, are looking for a career change. Their current position is coming to an end so they’re looking for another position – inside and outside their current company.
It’s hard to have one foot planted in the old and one in the new. No matter what it is you want to create in your life – new job, relationship, home – transition isn’t easy. There are lots of moving targets. It takes energy and effort. It can be stressful and nerve wracking! The word transition means: changing from one state to another, morphing into something new.
Here are a 5 tips to make any transition easier:
1) Be Strategic and Intentional. Think Quality over Quantity
2) Choose what Resonates, what Lights You Up. If it’s not a hell YES, it’s a NO
3) Have an Abundance Mindset, Be Open to what Unfolds
4) Hold Out for What You Really Want
5) Be Patient, it’s a Virtue. Have Radical Trust.
Just like the caterpillar who turns into the butterfly, you’ll struggle at times. You may want to throw in the towel. But if you’re committed and willing to see it through, you will morph. You will create something new – that delights you. #Faith.
If you’re currently going through a transition in your life and feeling overwhelmed, I can help.
Sign up for a free 45 minute coaching session here.
by Amy Matthews | Oct 2, 2018 | Business, In-Power |
One thing is blatantly obvious after last week’s happenings. We have a long way to go to achieve gender equality.
We also have al long way to realizing gender leadership parity. Women make up 51% of the US population. More women get college degrees than men. Yet less than 5% of CEOs of public companies are women.
If you feel angry and outraged with these sobering statistics, you are not alone. The progress and results made to date don’t speak for the amount of hard work, effort and time we’ve put into trying to change the course of history.
Whether it be in politics or business, we can either focus on the positive or the negative. We always have a choice on how we show up. We can get mad. We can get even. Or we can direct our anger into positive action. Day in and day out, we can claim our power, own our grace, speak up and make our voices and opinions heard.
We will win in some situations and lose in others. One thing is for sure — we will continue to make progress and build momentum. We will realize gender equality. We will realize leadership parity. It’s just a matter of when.
Never lose sight of the goal. #Keep Going. Keep on Keeping On.
