by Amy Matthews | May 5, 2020 | In-Power, Mindset |
Over the past 5 1/2 years since I founded my company, I’ve written and talked a ton about giving ourselves permission to be, do, think and say – who and what we want. Even though it’s our birthright to express ourselves authentically, some of us poo poo it. We’ve been conditioned by society that to get what we want – whether it be love, approval or success – we need to be and act a certain way.
No wonder. Women are taught to be good girls. To not rock the boat. To be demure. To not be ‘too big’. To put others first, always. Men are taught to be good boys. To be strong. To be in charge. To not share their feelings. To Man Up.
Following these rules leads to judging ourselves because we hold ourselves to such high standards. When we judge ourselves and play the comparison game, we end up judging everyone else in our lives. Nobody wants to be on the receiving end of that.
Here are a few things I’ve heard from clients and friends most recently:
I’m ashamed I let off steam, sang and danced wildly. it’s just not appropriate.
If I am honest and candid with my boss, she will think I’m complaining.
If I speak up on zoom calls, I’m concerned I’ll come across as too direct.
I can’t express my needs to my partner. I don’t want to come across as needy.
The truth is, the rules have changed. There hasn’t been a better time to #Breakfree from the rules that trap us, keep us small, keep us quiet, keep us safe, keep us “appropriate.” The new world after COVID will demand it of us so we might as well start making permanent changes now.
It’s time to give ourselves permission to show up unapologetically. It’s time to let our authentic selves shine and share our truth. It’s time to filter out the old rules that no longer serve and replace them with new ones that bring more joy and freedom into our lives.
What rules are you giving yourself permission to throw out? I liken it to cleaning out your closet. Get rid of the stuff that no longer resonates so you have room for the new.
by Amy Matthews | Apr 21, 2020 | Business, In-Power, Inspiration |
I’ve had many conversations over the past few weeks with clients, colleagues, friends and family about the challenges they’re facing and the disappointments they’re feeling.
Rightfully so, disappointment is widespread and frustration is at an all-time high.
High school and college grads aren’t able to graduate
Dream job interviews are at a standstill
Doing the job of two people
Working from home while homeschooling kids
Cash flow problems
Laid off or furloughed
Rocky relationships due to too much togetherness
Dating has come to a screaming halt
Do you resonate with any of the above or is there a bigger challenge you are facing? I want to know.
When we don’t get what we want – when we get a picture in our minds of an ideal outcome and get attached to it, disappointment rears its head. Disappointment makes us feel unmotivated. We think: what’s the point?
Here’s the point. Successful people aren’t spending their days binge-watching or reading the news. They have a schedule and a routine. They are planning their day, week, month – not year – ahead. They are thinking of creative ways to pivot. They are innovating and thinking outside the box. They are strategizing about how to get their dream business off the ground. They are looking forward to the simple things – every day.
If we believe that life is on hold, then life is on hold. If we believe that life is full of opportunity, then life is full of opportunity. We can move forward without attaching to a certain outcome. We can be adaptable and flexible and most importantly, have a positive attitude about our future.
Let go of the life you created in your mind. Open up to the life that’s in front of you. Let’s get into action and envision our future. No more waiting.
by Amy Matthews | Apr 15, 2020 | In-Power, Inspiration, Mindset |
We are in a transformational time. I liken it to a butterfly struggling to squeeze out of its tight cocoon. Perhaps just like the butterfly, this ‘downtime‘ is training us to strengthen our wings so we morph into expanded versions of ourselves.
What have you learned or what do you want to bring forward – once we have fewer restrictions?
Perhaps your patience and appreciation muscles are stronger. Or you have more gratitude for health and your circumstances. Or genuine kindness and compassion for everyone. Or you no longer keep up with the Joneses. Or give a hoot what others are up to on a Saturday night. Or you are committed to your own self-care. Or you have decided your job isn’t worth the sacrifice – anymore. Or that you have learned to slow down and focus on what truly matters.
Or, you are ready to spread your wings and build a life – on your own terms.
It takes courage to build a life on your terms. It takes courage to create clarity and conviction. It takes courage to stop listening to the negative voices in our heads. It takes courage to take repeated action towards what you want most. But here’s the thing: inspired action builds confidence and the more action you take, the more confidence you will have.
We get to choose whether we spread our wings and fly.
In my recent webinar, Step into Your Most Powerful Self, we had interactive conversations about letting go of what no longer serves us. We talked about how the “shoulds in life” rear their ugly head, how to live by your own rules, how to manage self-doubt, how to create a larger vision for your work in the world, and sticking with your intention, no matter what.
If you’re ready to step into
a bigger picture of success, let’s talk.
Your superabundant,
freedom-filled life awaits.
by Amy Matthews | Apr 8, 2020 | In-Power, Inspiration |
We’re in our 3rd + week of quarantine and many people feel they’re ready for a change of scenery. How about you?
Just a few weeks ago, we were accustomed to moving, changing, and diverting when we were bored or things weren’t exactly the way we liked or when we ‘had the urge’ for that special somethin’. At a moment’s notice, on a whim, we had the freedom to do and go wherever and get whatever we wanted.
Now many of us are at a standstill, waiting for life to get back to normal. Truth be told, when all said and done, life will look different than it did just a few weeks ago.
Our paradigm has shifted and we are being asked to shift too. We are being asked to get out of our comfort zone and step into a new way of being and doing. We are being asked to let go of thoughts, beliefs, and stories that no longer serve us. We are being asked to shed our shame, guilt, and past regrets. We are being asked to embrace new beliefs about ourselves and our world. We are being asked to fully embrace our power and confidence so we can step into a larger picture of success.
I didn’t say it was easy. But true success in life isn’t always convenient. Or easy. Or comfortable. I am reminded of this quote by Adriana Locke: The best things in life don’t come easy, but those things are the ones that are worth it.
Together, let’s build our confidence and rise up to ourselves so we can truly make a difference in other people’s lives.
by Amy Matthews | Mar 25, 2020 | In-Power, Inspiration |
We’ve been trying to get our head around what’s happened over the last week or so. We are going through a process and at different stages of settling into this new reality.
We are grieving. Like any loss, the process looks like this:
Denial – Early on, this virus isn’t real and won’t affect us
Anger – I have to stay home and can’t do what I want?
Bargaining – After two or three weeks, everything will be ok, right?
Sadness – I have no idea how this will end
Acceptance – This is happening, I need to come up with a plan
Acceptance allows us to gain our power back.
Some of us still have to catch up, aren’t ready to accept this new normal. That’s ok. Hurrying the process doesn’t work so give yourself permission to take a pause for as long as you need.
For others of us, we’re ready to figure out a plan on how to proceed.
To develop an action plan, decide what your intention is. Decide what your goals are. Decide what you are truly committed to. Perhaps it’s:
To expand your capacity to lead
To revision and reshape your life
To start your business
To get in the best shape of your life
To get your business online
To work on your significant relationship
To prioritize self-care
To dust off your resume and LI profile
To implement that business idea that you put on the back burner
To pivot your career or business entirely
What are your priorities – now?
If you feel you’re ready to get into action and need help, I would love to hear from you. I will send you an Action Plan worksheet that will guide you through the process.
Let’s take this opportunity to S T R E T C H. There is no better time than now.
by Amy Matthews | Mar 10, 2020 | In-Power, Mindset |
We’re living in unprecedented times. We are on lockdown in the San Francisco Bay Area and are stunned how quickly this has come upon us.
When the rug gets pulled out from under us when we don’t know and feel like we have zero control, it’s natural to feel our security is at stake, it’s natural to feel vulnerable. It’s natural to feel anxious. Let’s not forget, we’re human.
Times like these call for radical discipline. Discipline of our beliefs, thoughts, feelings, and actions. A few thoughts:
Reign in your fear, don’t let it run rampant. Pause and acknowledge it. Try not to share your anxiety with everyone. Fear is contagious so do your best to not spread it.
Manage the hoarding mentality. The media isn’t helping, I know! We will not go hungry. You are the only one who can determine how much is enough.
Think positive thoughts. Focus on all you’re grateful for. Get inspired about what you want to create next. Or your plan to pivot. Focus and inspiration are contagious too.
Get into nature and into your body. Walk, hike, online yoga, meditate. Do what makes you feel connected. Soak up the sunshine. Breathe and breathe some more.
Don’t forget humor and levity. Laughter is contagious too. I watched Stephen Colbert at 7am. Made my day!
What we focus on expands. Hunker down and choose wisely.
“Worrying won’t stop the bad stuff from happening. It stops you from enjoying the good.” – Author Unknown
If our current reality is getting the best of you, I can help. Book a free call with me here.
Stay healthy and spread light. #Faith.
