by Amy Matthews | Sep 22, 2020 | Blog, In-Power, Inspiration |
Ruth Bader Ginsberg paved the way for equality and justice for all. She had such a huge impact on our lives, it’s hard to fathom she’s gone.
RGB often quoted Justice Louis Brandeis’ famous line:
“The greatest menace to freedom is an inert people.”
So what do we do when we lose a trailblazer, an icon, and our role model?
We empower ourselves to speak up and share our point of view.
We take action towards what we believe in.
We fight for what we care about.
And, as RBG said, we do it in such a way, that will lead others to join us.
We all have the capacity to make an impact – whether big or small. I’ve talked to many people who feel powerless and want to know what they can do.
Here are four things to do right now to make a difference:
1. Contribute money – especially to flip the Senate, every bit helps
2. Talk to a family member or golfing buddy about racial injustice
3. Talk to your friend who hasn’t decided who to vote for
4. Initiate a conversation with your colleague about intrinsic bias
Drum up the courage. Have uncomfortable conversations.
Be willing to go where you haven’t before.
While being curious, inquisitive, and open.
Be THE Example. Let’s make Ruth proud of us.
by Amy Matthews | Sep 11, 2020 | Blog, Mindset |
We’re living in a world of Extremes.
Extreme fires
Extreme temperatures
Extreme smoke
Extreme ash falling from the sky
Extreme shootings
Extremists everywhere
So how do we deal with such a vast range without going into fear, numbing or tuning out?
Here are a few blogs that are good reminders on how to deal.
5 Tips for Self Care
How to Feel Grateful When You Don’t
How to Deal with Uncertainty
Do your best to accept the current situation. Talk it out with family and friends. Focus on super small goals to feel a sense of accomplishment. That’s what I’m doing.
This too shall pass. #Faith.
by Amy Matthews | Sep 3, 2020 | Blog, Mindset |
Along with the daily eruptions in the media that distract and create fear, so many of us have more on our plates right now. Some of the issues my clients are dealing with may resonate with you.
Homeschooling kids, nursing a terminally ill parent, personal health problems, an adopted newborn baby, chaos at work, relationship hiccups, company acquisition, reorgs, leadership issues. The hurricanes and fires wreaking havoc. It’s an intense time and emotions are running at an all-time high.
Anger is everywhere. People lashing out on social media, rage against our economy, racial injustice and recent killings, the emotionally charged political climate. An ever-growing list of conflict and dissonance. If anger is welling up inside, you are not alone!
Anger is a thermometer that tells us when our boundaries have been crossed. It indicates where we stand and what we believe in. Anger is a powerful and empowering emotion because we get to decide how we respond to it.
Before you send a text or create a post describing your outrage, or share how pissed off you are or yell at someone you love, think about your why:
Am I sharing because I don’t know how to process my jumbled emotions? Or, am I sharing to create connection and inspire positive action?
There is a big difference between acknowledging our anger and sharing it with others. Anger and rage are contagious. Just like Covid, we all have a responsibility to stop the spread.
Next time you feel anger bubbling up, slow down, take a few deep breaths and feel what you’re feeling. Your feelings matter and are completely justified. Once you’ve cooled your jets, communicate with clarity, connection, courage, and compassion.
It’s the only proven way people listen, engage, and respond. It’s the only way to get the outcomes you want.
by Amy Matthews | Mar 3, 2020 | Blog, Mindset |
Agendas, we all have them.
We were taught to create agendas, especially in our professional lives. I was at least. Agendas everywhere. Agendas for meetings, with clients, for certain outcomes. We learned that if we have a linear agenda, we would get the outcome we want. Agendas are synonymous with success.
Agendas may work in our careers but they don’t work in relationships.
When you have an agenda for a relationship, whether it’s with a friend, family member or romantic partner, you are pushing your wants, needs or fears onto the other person. Agendas are a way of trying to control the outcome. We’ve all been on the receiving end of someone who has an agenda. We can feel it. It feels like an expectation. It feels like a burden. It feels yucky.
So how to move out of the agenda trap? Ask yourself:
Am I caught up in what should happen or how it’s supposed to go? Shoulds are about expectations and will lead to disappointment, every time.
Is my primary focus to be reassured and get my needs met? Imagine you will get what you want. Take a deep breath and get present to what’s happening right now.
Am I focused on a specific outcome? Being laser focused on a goal robs us of fully engaging with the other person.
Clinging to an agenda keeps us in our heads, not in our hearts. Who wants that?
Ditch the agenda. Adios, buh-bye.
Open up to limitless possibilities, with every person, in every situation.
by Amy Matthews | Jan 8, 2020 | Blog, Inspiration |
Last week I wrote about looking back at all you’ve accomplished in the past year and how you’ve grown. Have you done that yet? It’s super important to be complete with the past year before moving to the next. If you aren’t yet, decide what you want to do about the things that aren’t complete and are preoccupying your mind. Perhaps you need to have a conversation or write about it. The objective is to be present as you create your goals for the new year.
You know what I mean. No shouldas, wouldas, couldas as you envision your future.
Now let’s look at what you want in 2020. You can choose to make it a daunting exercise or an exciting one. I say make it the latter! Buy yourself a new notebook, cozy up with a cup of your favorite tea and answer these questions:
What is my intention for the year?
What do I want to create?
What do I want my life to look like?
What am I saying YES to?
What am I saying NO to?
Once you have your answers, by all means, create a vision board. I created two this year, one for business and one for my personal life. Why not? Have fun with it. If you’d rather do it with others, invite a few friends over for a simple dinner and make a night of it.
To let more of what you want in, start saying NO to people and situations that zap your energy. Start saying NO to obligation and YES to what brings you inspiration, joy, and ease.
Each day, you get to decide what to bring into your life. Be intentional. Choose wisely.
by Amy Matthews | Dec 3, 2019 | Blog, Mindset |
I’ve had several conversations this week with men and women about expectations. In every one of my conversations, I heard the same thing. “It’s so hard not to have them.”
Every time we have an expectation of a person, a situation, whether it’s in business or in our personal life – when we don’t get what we want – disappointment can rear its ugly head. The source of the problem is not the expectation itself. It’s that we get a picture in our minds and fantasize and future trip about the ideal outcome and get attached to it. It’s the attachment to what we want that makes us struggle, not the expectation itself.
There is a bright side to disappointment. It shows us what we want, it shows us what we crave. It shows us we have passion for something. It shows us we care – deeply. It shows us we are on the right path towards getting what we want.
If your business deal goes belly up, there will be another one
If you don’t get the promotion, you will in the future
If your relationship has a rough patch, it will sort out
If the investor doesn’t resonate with your pitch, another one will
If the person you’re seeing doesn’t pan out, another one is around the corner
Expect success in every aspect of your life. Expect to fulfill your goals. Expect to have the relationship you want. Expect to create an extraordinary life. The caveat, of course, is: work hard to make whatever you want happen, happen and stay the course.
Let go of the life you created in your mind. Open up to the life that’s right in front of you.
