10 Things I Learned When I Quit My Job With No Solid Backup Plan

Don’t let fear of the unknown keep you in a job that makes you unhappy.

Answer by Anna Lundberg, life coach, trainer, and mentor, on Quora:

In September 2013, I walked out of my office and into the unknown. I had resigned from my job, the first after my studies, with no concrete plans as to what I would be doing next. I emptied my apartment of seven years, put my boxes into storage, and moved into my parents’ guest room as I thought about my next move.

My intention since the start had been to create a more independent and flexible lifestyle. I wanted to continue to work in digital marketing, where I had both the knowledge and the passion from my previous role; to pursue my more creative side by taking my writing more seriously; and, of course, to combine all this with the opportunity to travel and to spend time with friends and family.

So far, so good! This time last year, I officially incorporated my own consulting business and I’ve been busy on great projects ever since, working with big-name clients, making new connections, and sharpening my skill set. I finished my MatadorU travel writing course and I’ve been maintaining a regular post schedule and a growing reader base on my blog, as well as contributing guest posts to other websites. And I’ve continued my travels with weekend breaks in Europe as well as a longer trip to New Zealand, Australia, Malaysia, and Singapore.

So what have I learned, one year on?

1. Life on the other side is not as scary as you think.

As I looked out at the world from the comfort of a steady job, the fear of leaving that security behind was almost paralyzing. Once I had made the decision to quit and my perspective shifted to one of zero salary, 100 percent possibilities, that fear all but disappeared. I felt empowered and excited by my ability to make things happen, and I armed myself with information by reading books about freelancing and consulting, talking to people who had set up their own businesses, going to events where I met like-minded people. I also realized that the security I had felt in my previous job was an illusion; people get fired, departments are restructured, companies fold. Don’t let fear of the unknown keep you in a job that makes you unhappy.

2. You have to stick to your guns.

I thought I’d made The Big Decision once and for all, but I’ve had to keep questioning myself. The call of the corporate world is loud and alluring: Recruiters call with tempting job titles, my parents worry about my pension, clients want full-time support. Each time, I have to reaffirm my decision to leave that world behind, and each time, I come out that much stronger and more determined to stick with my new way of life. I’ve always looked to other people for reassurance and confirmation that I’m making the right decision, but I know now that I’m the only one who knows what’s right for me. So once you’ve made that decision, run with it, trust your instincts, and don’t look back.

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Why Working Longer Won’t Make You More Productive

I don’t know anyone who has worked for a traditional business and hasn’t run up against our cultural notion of what journalist Brigid Schulte calls “the ideal worker”—the perfect employee who, without the distractions of children or family or, well, life, can work as many hours as the employer needs.

Ideal workers don’t have hobbies—or even interests—that interfere with work, and they have someone else (usually a wife) to stay home with sick children, schedule carpools, and find decent child care. Babies aren’t their responsibility, so parental leave when an infant is born isn’t an issue; someone else will do that. The ideal worker can jump on a plane and leave town anytime for business because someone else is doing the school pickups, making dinner, and putting the children to bed.

In terms of sheer number of hours on the job, most working parents can’t compete with these ideal workers. Still, it’s easy for us Americans to aspire to the archetype. But our fixation on the ideal worker can lead us to hone only one strength: the ability to work long hours.

Unfortunately, honing that one strength won’t get us very far. Why? The ideal worker is not necessarily ideal. Reams of research suggest that people who work long hours, to the detriment of their personal lives, are not more productive or successful than people who work shorter hours so they can have families and develop interests outside of work.

So why do we continue to believe that the longer and harder we work, the better we’ll be?

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The Crossroads of Should and Must

This is a story about two roads?—?Should and Must. It’s a pep talk for anyone who’s chosen Should for far too long?—?months, years, maybe a lifetime?—?and feels like it’s about time they gave Must a shot

There are two paths in life: Should and Must. We arrive at this crossroads over and over again. And each time, we get to choose.

Over the past year I’ve chosen Must again and again. And it was petrifying. And at times it was dark. But I would never, ever, trade this past year for anything. This essay is my three biggest takeaways from the experience. It’s for anyone who is thinking of making the jump from Should to Must. Anyone looking to follow the energy deep within their chest but aren’t quite sure how.

Should is how others want us to show up in the world?—?how we’re supposedto think, what we ought to say, what we should or shouldn’t do. It’s the vast array of expectations that others layer upon us. When we choose Should the journey is smooth, the risk is small.

Must is different—there aren’t options and we don’t have a choice.

Must is who we are, what we believe, and what we do when we are alone with our truest, most authentic self. It’s our instincts, our cravings and longings, the things and places and ideas we burn for, the intuition that swells up from somewhere deep inside of us. Must is what happens when we stop conforming to other people’s ideals and start connecting to our own. Because when we choose Must, we are no longer looking for inspiration out there. Instead, we are listening to our calling from within, from some luminous, mysterious place.

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