The Procrastination + Perfectionism Loop

I recently had a conversation with a client and we talked about how much work he had on his plate, how he was falling behind and the anxiety he was feeling. I asked him a few questions:

Do you consider yourself a procrastinator?

Are you a perfectionist?

Have you always been this way?

I got a resounding YES from all three questions.

I said: “Procrastination always leads to feeling shitty.” He smiled and nodded his head.

80% of high achievers suffer from procrastination due to their high standards and expectations of themselves.

And, people who tend to procrastinate are more likely to be perfectionists. Perfection and procrastination go hand in hand. The truth is, it’s perfectionism that inhibits productivity.

Perfectionists believe they are loved for what they do, how they look, or for Doing It Right. I’m a recovered perfectionist but it still rears its ugly head, usually when I try really hard and don’t get the results I want.

The Perfectionism/Procrastination Loop is like being on a hamster wheel. It begins with having unrealistic standards, then fear of failure sets in, then avoidance comes next to stir up guilt and stress, which leads to thinking and feeling shitty about yourself.

Here are my 5 tips to break the perfectionism cycle:

1. Ask yourself, why do I believe I need to be perfect?
Most likely, it was how you learned to get love as a small child. Once you ask yourself, ask the question again, I bet you’ll get a different answer. You’ll recognize that you are loved for who you are – not for what you accomplish.

2. Stop second-guessing.
Doubting yourself and your actions is usually about what happened in the past. “Should I have handled the situation differently?” Start trusting yourself and the decisions you make. If you focus on what’s happening now, you can make a positive impact.

3. Release the judgment.
It only leads to a negative view of everything – yourself, situations and all the people who truly matter to you. Judgment dilutes your vitality. Instead, direct your energy into what you love and what inspires you.

4. Stop being your worst critic.
“Who are you to think less of yourself than others do? Belittling yourself is so passé. It’s time to learn to be kind and gentle with yourself.

5. Let go of unrealistic expectations of yourself and others.
Expectations only create disappointment, especially if they aren’t met. Be open to how things unfold. The outcome may be better than you imagined.

Having high standards and working hard to achieve goals is how you get ahead in life. Just don’t let it affect your happiness and those around you.